Mark Zuckerberg—Hands Down, Most Useless American

Facebook is what happens when you fail to discipline your kid at the checkout candy-counter. Somehow or another, he coasted through a sheltered life and worked out how to build a billion-dollar online site and still manage to retain shareholder control. I didn’t say he wasn’t clever, simply useless, defined as having no beneficial use or incapable of functioning usefully. He fell in love with algorithms and became one himself—a string of computer code with no conscience.

Mark Zuckerberg owns or controls 88.1 percent of Facebook's Class B shares, which each have 10 votes at the annual meeting—3.98 billion votes overall. There are only 2.4 billion Class A shares, which are the only shares ordinary investors can buy. So any proposal Zuckerberg doesn't like will fail by nearly a 2-1 margin, assuming all Class A investors vote together, which never happens. (Zuckerberg owns 0.5 percent of the Class A shares.)

I’m not sure how he managed that

Who knows? Maybe he went on a crying jag and stamp…